The Gaelic Gear Euro League Round 2 was held in Guernsey on April 30th 2005
Back row (L to R): Matt, Willie, Orson, Rory and Mary
Front row (L to R): Mark, Eddie and Derek
Quarter past eight, Friday April 29, six men and our travel coordinator waited patiently outside Central Station for our last player to arrive. Sadly he didn't come, Rory did. Three West Brits, Two Home Rulers, a hurler and a Tan, not the ideal combination for a Gaelic Football team but that’s what we had.
After the usual white knuckle ride through France with Orson we arrived in dinard with plenty of time to spare. We reached Guernsey by way of the Indiana Jones Express and settled in to the splender of our five star rooms. Already a sense of foreboding was filling the air, we walked around the town looking for something to eat. No one would feed us, and when we did get fed the owner tried to over charge us, mind you he reconsidered when Orson rolled up his sleeves. After dinner we made our way to the dirty dive for the much awaited draw, so we waited, and we waited, and we waited. Eventually just before closing time the draw was made and controversy ensued. no one knew who was in what side of the draw, a more cynical mind than mine might have thought the reason they had it so late was the hope that no one would remember it the next morning. It definitely worked on the St Farnin's boy's!
We got to the pitch changed and then the team was called out as follows, Orson the flying pig Mc Mahon, Derek the housewifes choice Butler, Willie the Tan Hempenstall, Mouldy Eddie, Mark close shave Gillette, Rory Van Nistelroy and Mattie Morris Minor. The first game against Rennes (who had already beaten Guernsey) saw Den Haag start where we left off at the Rennes tournament, good solid defence by the housewifes choice and the Tan with the pig snorting behind breathed confidence into a top notch midfield in mouldy and close shave who started the day as they meant to continue by taking score after score. The two forwards Van the man and Morris minor (ask Sunniva) played the game plan to perfection setting up the midfield time after time, the Rennes defence had no answer. The only scare was when the pig went over on his ankle, thankfully he stopped crying got up and continued on. So with a win under our belt and our food and drink co-ordinator looking after us, things were looking good.
Next up was London Senior side Jersey. It turned out to be a very evenly matched game between two very similar styled teams, that is the average age both teams was 38 years old. Den Haag started well with early scores coming from close shaves halfway line specials, some spellbinding interplay between mouldy and Van Nistelroy and the excellent "DECOY RUNS" of the Morris Minor. As the game wore on though the mental toughness of "'THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN'' was pushed to its limits by an experienced well organised and it has to be said (this goes for all the teams) numerically superior side. Despite some outstanding saves by the pig, fitige and some excellent attacking play by Jersey eventually led to a goal that would prove decisive and they took the tie by two points. This left the group evenly balanced with all teams having won one and lost one, so Den Haags last pool game with host side Guernsey would take on a life of it's own, and by Jaysus what a life that would be!
Guernsey got off to a flying start putting savage pressure on the Den Haag defence, with the Tan and the housewives choice having to draw on all their experience to hold out a lively Guernsey forward line. With the pig growing in to his new role as fat Steven Cluxton Den Haag hung in grimly. Now as we all know Guernsey are 7,s specialists, and they were showing it with their rapid substitutions with and without the mandatory baton, somehow the ref (who has been a guest of the club for the last eight years) failed to notice this! The first half ended with Guernsey holding the advantage. The second half began the same as the first and things were not looking so bright, but then like a light out of the blue, the famous spirit of Den Haag Gaelic Athletic Club was Awoken mouldy and close shave began to dominate Ronan Keating and partner in midfield Van Nistleroy homed in on the ball like a patriot missile on an Iraqi refugee and the morris minor was suddenly firing on all three cylinders. The goal which opened up the game was a result of text book team football clinically finished by the "FERRARI". At that point Guernsey started to lose their way, close shave knocked over two breathtaking points to bring it back to a point, then the collusion began. With Den Haag taking control (all 7 of them) in all areas of the pitch the result looked ominous for the home team but they had friends in high places. The first incident duly arrived, the ball was worked out to mouldy on the 45 with time to spare he angled a shot that Maurice Fitz would lust after, the crowed roared, the umpire stuck up his hand and the ref.......... waved it wide!! With only minutes remaining Guernsey were in no hurry to take the kick out but when they did close shave rose up like Wayne Rooney for a Granny, with his eye only on the goal Guernsey knew there was only one way to stop him "foul" on the 21. As he got up the guilty Guernsey player held him down close shave pushed him off, the "ref" awards a throw up for....... you guessed it "RETALIATION". Undeterred and superbly disciplined Den Haag pushed on, seconds remaining a foul on the left hand side 25 metres out, the pig snorted I'll take that! Up he marches, lines it up, and then rightly points out that the Guernsey players haven't retreated five metres never mind the rule book 13, the para, sorry the "ref" says take your free. Wide! Final whistle! Geurnsey1-5 Den Haag 1-4. You know the saying "Lie down with the bulldog, come up with Brit Fleas"
Down but not out we still had our Euro league points to play for. Gerrymandered in to the plate our reconciliation co-ordinator took the pig away from the "ref" who was now been referred to as a male chickensucker! After talk of Boycott we decided to play on. A comprehensive win over Guernsey B in which the Tan got to relive his Glory Days in the middle against another OAP it was now down to a rematch against Rennes. Before the game the team got in to their now famous huddle, (which is now copied by Celtic) the housewifes choice said the necessary words, the Fararri reacquainted himself with his bed partner in Rennes and we got on with obtaining our Euro Second place. Sorry Rennes, but it was a case of men against boys! Job done, time to drink.
So to the awards, (by the way Sean Mc Dermotts won the default final by a point over Guernsey) the housewives choice made a speech that Pat Kenny would be proud of. The "ref" made an apology for his ineptitude. It was like Tony Blair apologising for the famine! A great weekend followed. If you want to know more, mind your own business! Special thanks must go to our co-ordinator of everything the one, the only, Mary Gavin.
